As a public service, I’ve tried every flavor of Pop-Tart in each of four ways: frozen, untoasted, lightly-toasted and almost burnt. Here are my findings.
Flavors I will buy
- Frosted Raspberry — best frozen
- Apple Strudel — surprisingly good no matter how prepared
- Frosted Wild! Berry — best frozen
- Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon — best lightly toasted
Flavors I will eat if you buy them for me
- Frosted Blueberry — best lightly toasted
- Frosted Cherry — best frozen
- Whole Grain with Fiber Frosted Chocolate Fudge — best lightly toasted
- Strawberry Blueberry Splitz — best almost burnt
- Frosted Chocolate Fudge — best untoasted
- Frosted Strawberry Milkshake — best lightly toasted (but they smell better than they taste)
- Frosted Wild! Grape — best frozen
Flavors I recommend avoiding
- Frosted S’mores — best almost burnt
- Blueberry Muffin — best lightly toasted
- Blueberry — best lightly toasted
- Brown Sugar Cinnamon — best almost burnt
- Chocolate Banana Split — best lightly toasted
- Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough — best almost burnt
- Chocolate Chip — best almost burnt
- Cinnamon Roll — best almost burnt
- Frosted Cookies & Creme — best frozen
- Frosted Strawberry — best almost burnt
- Hot Fudge Sundae — best lightly toasted
- Low Fat Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon — best lightly toasted
- Low Fat Frosted Strawberry — best almost burnt (and somehow with much more strawberry flavor than the regular Frosted Strawberry)
- Strawberry — best lightly toasted
- Whole Grain with Fiber Brown Sugar Cinnamon — best lightly toasted
- Whole Grain with Fiber Strawberry — best lightly toasted
- Vanilla Milkshake — best lightly toasted (but when toasted even a little bit, the filling turns to liquid and runs out at the first bite)
In addition, I tested two flavors of Pop-Tarts Popsters, small squares of baked crust with frosting and no filling, Chocolate Blitz and Strawberry Blast. Avoid them both.
To sum up:
- As a rule, fruit flavors are best frozen.
- Unfrosted flavors are best lightly toasted, but if you’re not eating Pop-Tarts for the sugar, why are you eating them at all?
- Whole Grain with Fiber is simply not a good idea. Are there really people who eat these and think they’re doing something healthy?
- All the strawberry varieties are completely lacking in anything resembling strawberry flavor.
- Only one flavor, Frosted Chocolate Fudge, is best right out of the package.
- All the other flavors that involve chocolate in any way are lousy, at best.
- I’m glad I’m done with this endeavor.
You are welcome.