Highlights from Recent Reading

With my father, one never knew what was going to happen from one moment to the next. On one occasion he and I were walking through an uptown street in New  York after dark. In those days Fifty-eighth Street was far uptown. We probably were walking through Fifty-eighth Street from one avenue to another. There were any number of house lots which had not yet been built upon. These lots had board fences to prevent passers-by from falling into the rock pit which most of the vacant places seemed to be. In front of one of these board fences, and in the very dim light of the infrequent gas lamps, a tough-looking specimen demanded money. It really amounted to a hold-up, although no pistol was involved.

My father was an extraordinarily powerful man and as quick as a cat. Before the man had finished speaking my father grabbed him and actually boosted him up on the top of the fence and pushed him over. What he fell into on the other side, how much he was hurt, how he got out, and what he thought had happened to him have filled me with wonder these many years.

from A Genius in the Family, by Hiram Percy Maxim

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And sometimes just because you could have done better doesn’t mean you’ve done badly.

Carlton Fisk (addressing his father during his Hall of Fame speech)

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On our way back to the motel and well within the city limits of Tucson, a coyote ran across the road. The coyote is a great favorite of ours. If every town had more coyotes and less people, the world would be a much safer place in which to live. You will understand that my aversion to the human species is not so much that I dislike people as that I can’t stand them.

Adventures in Birding, by Jean Piatt

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Birding takes one out of doors; it satisfies the craving of every decent person to brush the morning dew from the grass and inhale what is left of our pure air. It is an engrossing pastime and one never wearies of it but only from it. It affords endless hours of armchair debate and exchange of bird lore with like-minded friends. It is exercise, of a sort. It offers an inexhaustible treasures store of knowledge to be assimilated; one never learns the millionth part of all. It helps one meet other people and make friends — if you like that sort of thing. It interrupts your work, which, in almost all cases, is a very good thing both for you and for the work. But more than all this, it is adventure.

Adventures in Birding, by Jean Piatt

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Not many people would feel impelled to buddy up to Bob Gibson. I suggested that he must be exposed to a good deal of barside baseball expertise at his place of work [Gibby’s restaurant in Omaha], and he said, “Who wants to talk to fans? They always know so much, to hear them tell it, and they always think baseball is so easy. You hear them say, ‘Oh, I was a pretty good ballplayer myself back when I was in school, but then I got this injury …’ Some cabdriver gave me that one day, and I said, ‘Oh, really? That’s funny, because when I was young I really wanted to be a cabdriver, only I had this little problem with my eyes, so I never made it.’ He thought I was serious. It went right over his head.”

Once More Around the Park, by Roger Angell

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Quisenberry [Dan Quisenberry of the 1985 Kansas City Royals] when pitching invites more similes than stats. His ball in flight suggests the kiddie-ride concession at a county fairgrounds — all swoops and swerves but nothing there to make a mother nervous; if you’re standing close to it, your first response is a smile. … The man himself — Quis in mid-delivery — brings visions of a Sunday-picnic hurler who has somehow stepped on his own shoelaces while coming out of his windup …

Once More Around the Park, by Roger Angell

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In September 1986, during an unmomentous Giants-Braves game out at Candlestick Park, Bob Brenly, playing third base for the San Franciscos, made an error on a routine ground ball in the top of the fourth inning. Four batters later, he kicked away another chance and then, scrambling after the ball, threw wildly past home in an attempt to nail a runner there: two errors on the same play. A few moments after that, he managed another boot, thus becoming only the fourth player since the turn of the century to rack up four errors in one inning. In the bottom of the fifth, Brenly hit a solo home run. In the seventh, he rapped out a bases-loaded single, driving in two runs and tying the game at 6-6. The score stayed that way until the bottom of the ninth, when our man came up to bat again, with two out, ran the count to 3-2, and then sailed a massive home run deep into the left-field stands. Brenly’s account book for the day came to three hits in five at-bats, two home runs, four errors, four Atlanta runs allowed, and four Giant runs driving in, including the game-winner. A neater summary was delivered by his manager, Roger Craig, who said, “This man deserves the Comeback Player of the Year Award for this game alone.”

Once More Around the Park, by Roger Angell

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[Politics is] the art of obtaining money from the rich and votes from the poor, on the pretext of protecting each from the other.

Oscar Ameringer, from A Third Treasury of the Familiar, edited by Ralph L. Woods

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A Bag of Tools

Isn’t it strange
That princes and kings
And clowns that caper
In sawdust rings,
And common people
Like you and me
Are builders in eternity?

Each is given a bag of tools,
A shapeless mass,
A book of rules;
And each must make —
Ere life has flown —
A stumbling block
Or a steppingstone.

R.L. Sharpe, from A Third Treasury of the Familiar, edited by Ralph L. Woods

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You get exactly the same results in Colossians 3:16 when the Word of Christ dwells in you richly that you get in Ephesians 5:19 when you are filled with the Spirit. There is an old rule in mathematics that “things equal to the same thing are equal to one another.” If to be filled with the Word is equal in result to being filled with the Spirit, then it should be clear that the Word-filled Christian is the Spirit-filled Christian. as the Word of Christ dwells in us richly, controls all our ways, as we walk in obedience to the Word, the Spirit of God fills, dominates, and controls us to the glory of the Lord Jesus Christ.

From In the Heavenlies, by H.A. Ironside.

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Lum & Abner Jot’em Down Store and Museum

From the early 1930s to the mid-1950s, Lum & Abner were a comedy duo that rival Laurel and Hardy in popularity. The characters were played by Chester Lauck (Lum) and Norris Goff (Abner), natives of Mena, Arkansas. They started their bit locally and soon became famous around the country as a weekly radio program. By 1940, they were starring in the first of several movies.

The comedy was set in Pine Ridge, Arkansas, around the store of Dick Huddleston. Huddleston, and many other local natives, were the models for characters in the skits. The store and a couple other buildings from the time have been preserved and now serve as a museum. I drove down from London on a Wednesday afternoon and was the only visitor at the attraction—and perhaps in the town.

It looked very deserted, and I was bracing myself for the disappointment of a wasted two-hour drive. I walked up on the porch to read the signs but soon was greeted by a women who strolled down from her house.

She asked if I wanted to see inside and I told her yes, but first I wanted to use a bathroom. She directed me to a field behind the museum.

A sign in the outhouse informed me that it was an “Eleanor,” named for Eleanor Roosevelt whose efforts to improve the lives of rural Americans resulted in outhouses with cement foundations and outside vents.

Back at the museum, Kathy (that was the woman’s name) let me in through the back door. Later she informed me that “If I unlock the front door, I get more visitors than I like to deal with.” I wondered if she’d had any visitors in the past month.

The museum consisted of four rooms with a hodgepodge of old stuff mixed in with photos and artifacts related to Lum & Abner.

Photos of real residents of Pine Bluff who inspired characters on the show.

Kathy had worked at the museum for 30-some years and had created a lot of the displays. These mannequins were rescued from a clothing store in Mena.

Kathy must have been close to 90, and while she still retained her passion, she was losing her words. Many of her sentences began or ended in the middle. She referred to Covid as “that think that made everyone stay home.” I don’t know how much longer she’ll be able to run the place, and I wonder if there’s anyone interested enough to take over when she’s gone. She was very nice, and I enjoyed talking with her.

I mentioned that my parents liked Fibber McGee and Molly, and she showed me this photo of Lum and Abner with the Jordans.

One room of the museum was made up like an old general store with items from a local store that had modernized.

Pictures of the Huddleston Store in the early days.

And one from after the show became a hit. Huddleston cashed in on its popularity.

The store contained the Pine Ridge post office, no longer active.

I bought a few souvenirs in the store, including a book on Lum & Abner written by Kathy in the 1990s. We left through the back door, and after she’s locked up, she showed me some things outside, including some rock stacks she’d created to look like presidents (see the video). I was there about 45 minutes and never saw a hint of another visitor.

In the evening, I found the first Lum & Abner movie, Dreaming Out Loud, online and watched it. The first part was the cornball slapstick I expected, but then it became a drama with a young girl being killed by a hit-and-run driver and a doctor dying of a heart attack while saving a young boy with pneumonia. It wasn’t at all what I expected.

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Weinkeller Restaurant

Altus, Arkansas, is the center of the state’s wine-making area. One of the vineyards, Wiederkehr Wine Cellars, is home to Weinkeller Restaurant, which specializes in Swiss-inspired food. The restaurant is one of several buildings designed to look like a village, but its obvious that the heyday—if there was one—was long ago.

Although it’s above ground, the restaurant is made to look like a wine cellar.

I noticed that the clientele—most of whom arrived after we did—were retired couples. Like us. Who else could eat lunch in the middle of nowhere on a Tuesday afternoon? We both ordered the smoked pork loin and were not disappointed.

The apple strudel we shared for dessert was good, but not great. Because of the pleasant drive through the country, the ambiance of the restaurant, and the good food, we may very well visit again.

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Ed Walker’s Drive-In

Somewhere or other, I found a list of the best drive-in in each state. This was Arkansas’ claim to fame. It’s been around since 1943. It brags about having the largest cheeseburger (5 pounds of meat) and the only curbside beer service in the state. This later fame has something to do with Fort Smith being a border town and the service being grandfathered in.

It’s a typical diner, with typical diner fare. It’s mainly famous for its French dip sandwich, and that’s what I got. It was very tasty. The fries that accompanied it were average.

And in keeping with the Elvis theme of the day …

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Fort Chaffee Barbershop Museum

This museum, located on the grounds of Fort Chaffee, is dedicated to that important moment when Elvis got his famous sideburns trimmed upon induction to the Army.

The room that housed the barbershop has been redone, with photos of Elvis’ haircut on the walls and a cut-out of him in one of the barber chairs.

A display reads:

Elvis Aaron Presley, US 53310761, arrived at Fort Chaffee on the night of March 24, 1958.

He reported to the installation for induction processing. The Army planned a low-key affair, but Presley’s manager, “Colonel” Tom Parker, had other plans.

According to reports, Parker turned a routine military procedure into a media circus, much to Presley’s chagrin. On March 25 the installation barber shop at Building 803, was filled with army recruits and press coverage from all around the world in addition to local photographers and reporters. Everyone was waiting for the sideburns to fall to the floor.

To make sure that souvenir hunters did not make off with any clippings, the hair was swept up with the other recruits’ clippings and military personnel then escorted it to a waiting garbage truck.

In addition to the haircut, Presley also received his uniform issue and inoculations. Almost every move he made during his three days at Chaffee were under the watchful eyes of the media.

After his stay here, Presley was shipped to Fort Hood, Texas for training as a tanker. After training, he served with the 2nd Armored Division in Germany in September 1958. Reports say that Presley was a good soldier and was promoted to the rank of sergeant on January 20, 1960, shortly before his discharge in March.

The bit about not wanting any to grab his hair as a souvenir struck me as a bit much.

They even have one of the cameras used to take the photos!

One of the reporters suggested that Elvis blow some of his hair out of his hand. He did, quipping, “Hair today, gone tomorrow.”

Anyway, reports online suggest that the museum often isn’t open when it’s supposed to be, but I got lucky. I arrived just as a tour from a local old-folks home came by. I joined the group without waiting for an invitation and, although I got a few odd looks, nobody questioned me. Beside the Presley barbershop display, there are other bits about Fort Chaffee and it’s history, but those mostly consisted of unlabeled artifacts and photographs. I didn’t stay long.

It was all ridiculous, of course, but in a harmless, fun way. After all, it’s more significant than the monument in northeastern Arkansas to the time when the Beatles changed planes.

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